“Maybe you’re a Marxist.”

“I don’t think so,” but I wasn’t sure because I didn’t know (don’t know) what Marxism is all about, who Marx was beyond a leader of a big movement, or what it would mean to say “I am a Marxist” today or ever.

I will confess to a truth I read about myself today: I am afraid of things I don’t know anything about, particularly big things like movements and philosophies, institutions, cultures, and trends — until I take the time to find out what they are about.

But I can also say now, without and/or before digging into all of the -isms and -ities, that if my beliefs and inclinations seem to follow one or another it is by random coincidence or too small a sample space because mine is an ‘open source’ belief system built of life experience, observation, hard healing work, and a constantly and repeatedly opened heart. My beliefs are not cherry-picked ideas that ‘resonate’ but rather what remains after the furnace-burning proof of a hard-lived life.

I will not adopt another man’s (or woman’s) theology as long as I am able to craft my own. When life knocks against the walls of my own church, I am just as inclined to tear down that wall as others would be to reinforce it. My measure and rule is love. My method is ‘taste and see.’

The path of truth for me is not a path of bliss or never-ending light but trust and faith that I am here for a reason and am not abandoned or alone. When I forget this, life is reliable to remind me from whence my reason, my reality, my destiny comes.

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